The way I sleep
an interpretive dance
Heart beating fast
Or too loud

The way I sleep
following the rhythm
of the crickets
singing a local weather report

If you could calculate
each lull between
you could find the temperature
of the small spaces
under the refrigerator
or in the bathroom walls

The way I sleep is like that

Bloated, a heavy balloon
filled to burst before escaping
up or until limp and flat again
pain before release relief

The way you sleep
a conversation
too much meaning
or none at all

the way you sleep
finds me jealous
finds me watching
finds me wanting

until, until

hot feet
to slip free
face to find
the cool side
of the pillow (again, again)
body to twist and spin
until knee almost reaches chin

until, until

arms cross and mind shuts off
and heart can steady

until, until

I forget to be awake
I forget to be awake
I forget

the way i sleep

the way i sleep is often interpretative
heart beating too fast, too loud
or following the rhythm of the crickets
(whose legs rub against one another)
singing a local weather report
if you could calculate each lull between
you'd know exactly what temperature the small space under your refrigerator
or in the wall behind your toilet was

the way i sleep is like that

or bloated, a heavy balloon
filled to burst before any chance of escaping
up or until limp and flat again
pain before release relief

hot feet
to slip free
face to find the cool side of the pillow
(again, again)
body to twist and spin
until the knee almost reaches chin
arms cross and mind shuts off and tunes out
the crickets or clocks or distant murmurings

heart to steady

this is how i sleep

i forget
to be awake.

moth on the ceiling - fluttering
moth on the ceiling - come in from the light

no life left to live on the outside
no heart left to give in the bright side


paint thick and peeling - grayed and dull
paint thick and peeling - the years have gone by

layer by layer, through to the inside
on to the bottom, the wall is at low tide


the rain outside makes me want to stay
in bed watching from the window today
waiting for an obvious sign
to open up and let it in

water
i'm clinging
you're swimming
away

heartache
i'm singing
you're trying
to stay

you don't want to be unfair
who says i want it fair

confusion
it's filling
it's tearing
you down

decisions
are splitting
are making
you drown

since i love you
let me go

the sky is like the radio
so staticky and full of talk
but in the twilight time
with a swirl, a flash, it stops

the clarity is blinding
before the clouds form
this sharpness is an ending
to what we knew we'd known

the water came and filled up the drain
in the city square
and we all became sea-life
breathing the flood like air

and we swallowed the bubbles of our fellows
to live and love here
and our houses are built out of things we can't sell
to protect us from our surface fear

the sky is like the radio
tune into the deep
and in the twilight time
how differently we sleep

we'd never felt like floating
for all the weight we'd lost
this feeling is a beginning
to what we know

and all our graves
will be watery
and our ashes will be scattered in the sea
we'll have no need to cry for the fallen

and we swallowed the bubbles of our fellows
to live and love here
and our houses are built out of things we can't sell
to protect us from our surface fear

the sky is like the radio
so staticky and full of talk
but in the twilight time
with a swirl, a flash

you're so incorporeal tonight
you're so i can see my hands through you
do you wish that you were a ghost
to explain yourself, explain yourself

you're so incorporeal tonight
you try to touch, but you can't touch
do you wish that you were asleep
to explain yourself, explain yourself

and do you really matter?
and does it really matter?
are you hard up for matter?
does it matter to be matter?

i want to see
your bones
hard and hollow
beneath a flawed exterior

i want to see
your bones
gleaming and blurred
in gray and white

when your skin gives way
through the bruises and marks
left by body's confusion
of size and shape

i want to see
your bones separately
connected to the weight
on your burdened shoulders

i want to see
your bones
without a reminder
of distance and time

when your eyes give way
to colors and shadows
so often confused
with meaning and answers